This post comes with a story. I guess there's a first time for everything. But you gotta promise to read the whole thing. Don't scroll down until you read everything first. This is important. Here goes.

GP, Mel, Joe, and I were driving around today, and GP pulls up at a red light, waiting to make a left turn. Suddenly he yells out "SPIDER!. He grabs the closest thing he can find to smash the poor defenseless spider. He takes aim at the spider (which had crawled up on the upper part of the driver side door), but just missed it. Unfortunately for him, the spider dropped somewhere near his lap.

Sound like a familiar story yet?

The light was still red, and GP thought the spider was gone. At least out of sight. Out of sight, out of mind, right? Well, he felt an itch. And he thought twice. It was an itch alright, in a place you don't neglect to scratch. SPIDER! He pushed his door open and jumped out, shaking his pants, hoping the spider would end up anywhere else besides inside his pants. That was a close call. Or so he thought.

Later that night, we all headed to Corona Del Mar. By the way, has anyone seen a girl who hangs around CDM looking for a guy with a lot of hair that likes to take pictures? If so, let me know. Anyway, GP was posing for some model shots by the water, along with fellow models Mel and Joseph. Then I noticed one of the pictures came out funny:
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WHOA.
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Needless to say, we were all stunned. GP was shocked. Could he have been bitten (where the sun don't shine) by a radioactive spider? Did he have spider powers? Peter Parker got super strength and super senses. Ironically, GP already had the strength of 100 chimpanzees and the senses of an eagle, owl, bloodhound, mongoose, pit viper, and wombat all at once. So the spider bite might has caused this unexpected side effect. He decided to check one more time before the others saw.
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What he saw confirmed his suspicions. Feeling slightly relieved that although he had been bitten by a radioactive spider, he was still very much alive (and in fact had a certain "glow" about him), he had to show the others.
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Let's give it up for those arachnids!!

(side note) The story you have just read is 100% true (aside from the fabrications). If you haven't read it, shame on you. It took a lot of time.